I’ve written a lot about coaching.  You can see quite a few articles right here.  Today I want to warn you about something you might find surprising given my reputation for advocating a “lowered bar” approach for group leaders.  I want to really encourage you not to compromise or lower the bar in terms of who you recruit as coaches and what you expect of them.  Let’s talk about those two subjects:

Who To Recruit As Coaches

In an earlier article I wrote about the kind of person that makes the best coach.  The short version is that your candidate needs to be passionate about grouplife and they need to be at least a 60 fold person.  I’m referring to Jesus’ use of the 30, 60 and 100 fold idea in Mark 4 and other places.  It only makes sense that you can’t expect a 30 fold person to lead (or coach) and 60 fold person.

In addition to their competence, another very important qualifier is that the coaching candidate be in agreement with your small group philosophy.  You need to be on your guard on this issue because it’s one of the places we’re most likely to compromise.  For example, if you are trying to build a small group ministry on the idea that by lowering the bar in terms of who can lead and one of your coaches is constantly fretting over whether you’re allowing the wrong people to lead…you’re going to have problems.  Make sure that your coaching candidates are in philosophical agreement and do it before you invite them onto the team.

I’ve listed a whole set of recruiting ideas right here.

What To Expect of a Coach

Developing and communicating expectations is another place where compromise will definitely come back to haunt you.  Developing a job description is an important step.  A periodic review that measures the coach’s activity is essential.  If you inspect what you expect, a lot more will end up happening.

Summary

This may sound like an oversimplification, but developing expectations (both in terms of philosophy and performance) on the front end and then sticking to them will go a long way toward producing a coaching structure that works.  Will it be perfect?  Not hardly!  But it doesn’t need to be perfect.  Don’t compromise on these two things and it will be more than good enough.

(This is part four of a series.  You can read part one right here.)

Once you’ve developed a clear job description for your coaching team, carefully selected the right people and recruited them skillfully you’re in position to help them get off to a great start in their coaching relationship.  This is a very important step that makes or breaks many coaching strategies.  Done well, you’re off and running.  Implemented poorly and you’re toast before you begin.  Here are some keys to beginning well:

• Remember that it’s always easier to connect a new coach with a new group leader.  Attempting to retrofit a new coach with an existing small group is only occasionally effective.  Groups that have survived on their own (without a coach) rarely clamor for a coach.  More often, they are resistant to the idea that it could be helpful.
• Great opportunities to connect a new coach with a new group leader are at new leader orientations or host orientations.  Seating new leaders at a table with their coach, recognizing your coaches and highlighting the advantages of having a coach, then releasing the tables to get to know each other is a very effective first step.  In fact, I’ve often set up first contact as the invitation (or reminder) phone call to attend the orientation.  Let the new coach make the call.  Here’s the basic script: “Hi, this is __________ calling from __________.  Just wanted to remind you about the new leaders orientation this Saturday at 9:00 a.m.  Are you going to be able to make it?  Great!  Why don’t you guys sit with me?  I’m hosting a table at the orientation and would love to hear a little of your story.”  Important: Notice that they don’t introduce themselves as a coach.
• With new leaders seated with their new coaches it’s a slam dunk to recognize coaches as a real value add.  “We’re so excited about the new groups that are beginning in the next week or two.  We really want you to get off to a great start.  One of the things we’ve found makes a big difference is to connect each of you with someone who has done what you’re about to do.  We’ve spent the last few months recruiting a great team of experienced small group leaders who will be available every week to help you when you need any help.  These guys and gals have led really effective groups, they’ve been through it, and you’ll really benefit from their knowledge and experience.  If you’re on our coaching team would you raise your hand?  Why don’t you take the next few minutes at your table, just to get to know each other.”  If you build up your coaches in the eyes of your leaders it will make it much easier to get them connected.  Important: Notice that you recognized and recommended your new coaches.
• Connecting existing leaders with a coach poses a greater challenge.  I’ve found it much easier to focus on connecting brand new leaders with a coach and develop a strategy that assists existing leaders to connect with other leaders in a way that leads to a kind of mutual care.

I’m developing an article describing how to help existing leaders grow.  If you’re not subscribed to my blog, you can do that right here.

Looking for a leader training resource?  Finding the Flow: A Guide for Leading Small Groups and Gatherings, by Tara Miller and Jenn Peppers, is one you should take a look at.  New from IVP, it’s full of great leader training ideas, practices, and philosophy.  This is a book length training guide.  At over 240 pages (including a very helpful appendix), it is not a skim through manual.

When selecting a training resource, practical, hands-on experience, is very important.  Written in a very conversational way, this is also the story of two group life practitioners.  The authors

Looking over the contents you can get a pretty good idea of the style.  Chapters on knowing yourself, stages of group life, listening to God and others, asking good questions, navigating group conflict, developing new leaders and spiritual transformation let you in on the fact that this is not really a book about technique.  In fact, in the forward by Joseph Myers we learn that, “This is a field book for spotting the patterns people use to connect.  This is not a guide to clone groups.  This is a guide to help you develop environments where people can connect in organically ordered patterns.”

The book is based on the idea that small groups are “like a river.”  Out of that idea comes the notion that like a river, small groups need a water source, they need help charting their course, there will always be undercurrents and times when the waters are stirred.  The metaphor works very well because Finding the Flow is really more of a travel journal written by two very experienced travelers.  In the stories that are shared on almost every page you can sense that the depth is based on hands-on participation.

In addition to a liberal supply of great stories and illustrations, you’ll also find a steady supply of “Do This” tips that are very practical and will easily move from great idea to implementation.  Paired with a really practical set of appendices you’ll definitely get your money’s worth out of this resource.

If Finding the Flow has a downside, I think it’s that it will mostly be used by small group pastors and directors to develop training experiences and practices…as opposed to being used by group leaders as a work-through-and-discuss journal.  In my world of busy small group leaders, reading a 240 page journal is not high on the list of probabilities.  The upside?  You need this book.  Your coaches probably need this book.  It is the kind of reading that will inspire you to try a few new things.  And some of those new things will become part of your system and that will change the flow for groups in your church.

My copy of Growing Small Group Leaders arrived over the weekend.   If you’re trying to build a coaching structure that works, I’m thinking you’re probably going to want to pick up a copy.  Developed by Seacoast’s leadership development expert Mac Lake, this tool is packed with some very good plug and play training ideas, tips and an overview of a very workable structure.

I particularly like the fact that this workbook is the product of in-the-field development as opposed to a nicely worked out theory that hasn’t actually been tested.  I think you’ll like the well thought out and systematic approach, knowing that you’ve got the building blocks that will help you put together a coaching structure of your own.

Covering everything from how to assess your coaching style and set a coaching schedule to how to conduct effective one-on-one meetings and lead an effective huddle, Growing Small Group Leaders is a tool that will make your job as a point leader much easier.  In addition, an enhanced CD with many of the assessments and forms discussed in the workbook is included.

The one issue of concern with this resource is the price.  At $69.00 it will more likely be added to the point leaders reference library and used to develop coaches (who will in turn develop leaders) as opposed to a workbook that each of your coaches will receive.

Overall, this is a resource you will get a lot of use out of.  If you’re looking for ideas that will help you build a very effective coaching structure that actually develops small group leaders, this is a tool you’re going to want to add to your toolkit.

Caught this great interview of Bill Donahue over at MacLakeOnline.  Good stuff!  Check it out.

There are a few books every small group pastor needs.  One of those books is Making Small Groups Work by Henry Cloud and John Townsend.  You may recognize their names as the authors of the best-seller, Boundaries.  If you’re looking for source material to build a leader training or enrichment course, this is a must have.

Delivered in a very digestible format, Making Small Groups Work’s 292 pages is divided into 6 parts.

• How Small Groups Help People Grow: a very helpful section on the ingredients that make groups conducive for growth.
• What Happens in a Good Group: more than a description, this section is written to help leaders and members learn how to build forgiveness, mentoring, grieving, accountability, and 10 other elements into the group.
• Starting a Small Group: provides an excellent overview on the importance of deciding on purpose and ground rules as well as how to do it.
• The Responsibilities of Group Facilitators: this section could be the basis for a multi-session workshop for leaders covering everything from how to listen, facilitate for change, provide safety, and a number of other important topics.
• The Responsibilities of Group Members: if you’re looking for material that can guide desired outcomes of discussion material produced in-house, this is a very helpful section.
• How to Deal with Problems in Groups: this section ought to be included in the training process for every leader.  From neediness to passivity, you’ll find help for 7 of the most challenging issues leaders face.

Whether you can afford to purchase several and make them available as required reading for leaders or you simply pick up one for yourself and use it as a resource to develop leader training, Making Small Groups Work is required reading  for every small group pastor.

What technologies are you using in your small group ministry?  Website page?  Blog?   Facebook?  Twitter?  Data management system (like Churchteams or GroupsInteractive)?

Or are you doing the things according the the KJV?  You know…the old fashioned way.  Printed catalogs?  Phone trees?  Sign up forms?

The times are achangin’ you know.  Today your leaders can download session 2 from the blog, interact with each other, let you know the DVDs are defective.  They can meet up with their coach via tokbox or google’s video chat.  You can update everyone via Facebook or Twitter with a text message from your phone.

So what technologies are you using in your small group ministry?  Take 2 minutes and answer our two question survey.  Click here to take the survey.  I’ll put up the results in an upcoming post.

In our ongoing look at the top 10 axiomatic beliefs of group life, one area that ought to draw our attention is coaching.  It is logical that a coach would be helpful…even required.  But who makes the best coaches?  It is so common for churches to make that assignment to their elders or deacons.  But do they have what is needed to do this job?  Other churches are stuck in the idea that there is a career path that leads from member to leader and from leader to coach.  Is that likely to produce a good team of coaches?  Or is there more to this?

When you’re new to a sport or activity and you want to develop proper techniques, who makes the best coach?  Isn’t it obvious that it’s someone who has done what you’re trying to learn to do?  After all, when you want your kids to learn to swim…you know you need someone to coach them or teach them who knows how to do it.

Makes sense right?

Then why is there confusion about who makes the best small group coach?  Probably because the role of the coach is inadequately defined.  If you know what you’re looking for, it’s easier to find the right person.  Here’s the job description I’m using right now.  Take a look.  Keep it open.  And follow along right here.

First, notice what the purpose is: “To produce healthy disciples.”  That should tell you a lot.  Note what it doesn’t say.  “Chief score-keeper” or “Accountant.”  Instead, you’re looking for someone who’s capable of building disciples.  That tells you a great deal about the kind of person you’re looking for.  On top of that, two of their top responsibilities are more about a personal connection with Christ than anything they might do for the small group leaders they are coaching.

Second, you’ll see that there is the expectation that they’ll host a huddle every 4 to 8 weeks.  That will require some preparation, a commitment to getting dates on the calendar, and the kind of winsome personality that draws people in and helps them feel comfortable.

Third, there is the expectation of personalized care for each of the leaders in their huddle.  I love the word “care.”  It makes it clear that this is more than score-keeping or accounting.  My contention is that whatever I ultimately want to members of a group to experience…the leader has to be experiencing it first.  That is, if I want the member to feel cared for, somehow I need to make sure the leader feels cared for.  This is a great challenge.  Very tough to do.  But it is the goal of the coaching structure.

Fourth, there is a need to be on the lookout for the next generation of coaches.  As your structure grows, as you increase the number of groups and the number of people in them, you’ll want your coaches (who are the right people) to be looking for potential coaches (who are becoming the right people).

Last, there is the expectation that your coaches will be involved in a huddle with other coaches where their own care needs will be met.  After all, whatever you want your leaders to experience will need to be experienced first by their coaches.

When you think about these 5 parts of the job…can you see your elders or deacons in the role?  Are some more suitable than others?  Is it likely that every small group leader could become a coach at some point?  Or would there be a kind of person who could care for 8 to 10 members that couldn’t care for 5 to 6 leaders?

When you’re looking for coaching candidates keep these requirements in mind.  For more on this topic, see my four part series.

Thursday, September 3rd, 12:00 to 12:45 pm CDT

Click here to register

Trying to figure out why your small group ministry isn’t really delivering the results you’re looking for?  Resigned to the fact that in your church it just doesn’t work?  I want to suggest that there are probably some underlying assumptions that are keeping you from seeing things a different way.

One of the most important books I’ve read in the last decade has been Gary Hamel’s The Future of Management.  Particularly chapter 7 on escaping the shackles.  There are some ideas in that chapter that have come to shape my thinking about what is possible and what we could be doing in small group ministry.

I want to invite you to join me and the Willow Creek Association Group Life team for a conversation on how to apply Gary Hamel’s principles to your ministry.  I know you’ll find it helpful.  I believe you’ll leave with some next steps that will make a difference.  You can join the conversation from your home or office.  And…it’s free.

Thursday, September 3rd, 12:00 to 12:45 pm CDT.

Click here to register!

A great conversation yesterday drew an important question.  We’re getting ready for a church-wide campaign and know we’ll need coaches for our newest hosts.  Where can I find new coaches?

Ever asked that one?  It’s a good question.  Important on a couple levels.  First, it is important that your newest hosts have a coach who is available to help and who is checking in with them on a weekly basis.  The first 10 to 13 weeks of their new existence is a critical time period, not unlike the first few days and weeks of a newborn’s life.  That said, it follows that if you recruit a wave of new hosts to open their homes for a church-wide campaign, you could suddenly need an additional coach (or 10!).  So…where will they come from?

Here are a couple thoughts:

1. Although it’s not essential, I look first among existing small group leaders for coaches.  You probably do to.  The reason I look there is that they’ve made it as a group leader and understand some things about what works.
2. Depending on what I find among existing group leaders, I’m not opposed to recruiting from outside but they have to really fit the bill from a teachability standpoint and from a SHAPE standpoint.
3. I’m not looking for warm and willing.  I’m looking for hot and qualified.  That is, the ideal candidate has a passion for group life, is a high-capacity leader, is loyal to our church and our pastor, is very relational and fun to be around.

The second reason this is an important question is that coaches need to be recruited to the function before they’re recruited to the form.  You’ve heard of “form before function?”  I’ve found it makes a big difference when I simply ask a seasoned small group leader to take a new host or two under her wing, just for 10 to 13 weeks (six weeks of the campaign, couple weeks before, couple weeks after).  I’ll frequently say:

I’ve seen you in action over the last year.  You’re doing a great job with your group.  Would you be willing to help get a couple of our new hosts get off to a good start?  Sit with them at the orientation.  Connect with them weekly.  Make sure they have what they need to really succeed?

This is function before form.  Before I sit down with them and invite them to join our coaching team, I want to see them in action.  By agreeing to help get a couple new groups started they’re able to put their toe in the water without a long-term commitment.  I’m able to see if they’ll do the job and whether they’re really a fit for it…before I offer them an ongoing role on the team.  This is big because it’s a lot easier to ask someone to become a coach than it is to ask them to stop coaching!

Once you’ve had a chance to see them in action you can decide if they are a good fit and whether you’d like to add them to the coaching team.  I’ve found it is really beneficial to ask them how it felt to help a couple new hosts get started.  You need them to be fruitful and fulfilled.  One without the other is not good.  Fruitful without fulfillment doesn’t lead to long term service.  Fulfillment without fruit doesn’t help anyone.  You want both and it’s worth holding out for.