Rick Howerton’s Latest Learning: 6 Compelling Reasons to Consider Intergenerational Groups
“Many will hesitate when it comes to intergenerational* groups. I certainly understand the hesitation. While I am a proponent of all types of groups, there are at least six very compelling reasons churches should consider them.” Rick Howerton
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In a recent post, I pointed out the fact that we’re not living in “a day when the status quo is a good thing. At the beginning of the second decade of the 21st century…it is clearly time to develop a bias toward what’s next.” To help all of us figure out what’s next, I’ve asked a number of the best-known grouplife practitioners to share their latest learnings.
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Here’s Rick Howerton’s Latest Learning:
Fact #1: Intergenerational groups require moms and dads to be models and mentors. A healthy intergenerational small group is the perfect place for a child to see a multi-dimensional Christian life modeled by mom and dad. A great group will cry out to God on behalf of one another, be on mission together, learn and live out God’s directives found in scripture together, carry one another’s burdens, forgive one another, and the list goes on and on.
Fact #2: Intergenerational groups are the key to the next generation continuing to connect with a local church. Studies have shown that “five or more” adults investing time with a teen “personally and spiritually” is a vital factor in a youth continuing to journey with a local church. There may be no more natural way for a teen to be substantially connected to five adults who invest in them personally and spiritually than by their being involved in an intergenerational small group.
Fact #3: Young adults long for and need older adults to mentor them. LifeWay Christian Resources did an extensive study of young adults. Their interviews pointed out the following facts.: Young adults:
- have a strong desire for relationships with people who are more experienced at life.
- have an increased interest in learning from other people’s mistakes and experiences.
- have a desire for relationships that go beyond their own stages of life.
- have a desire to process hurts or frustrations with others who may have already experienced what they’re going through
Fact #4: Not-Yet-Adults add much to the small group experience. When children receive Christ they are not then filled with a miniature Holy Spirit. The same Holy Spirit indwelling every adult in a small group is also supernaturally at work in and through any child or teen and God will use them in the lives of everyone in the group in profound ways.
Fact #5: Intergenerational grouping gives one-parent kids two parent relationships. One-parent homes are norm. In a one-parent home one of two households exists, a mom and her kids or a dad and his kids. Any child living in a one-parent home is at a great loss as they are without a model of either the male parent or the female parent. While group members can never replace a mom or dad, group members can be models and mentors to a child whose home is void of one gender or the other.
Fact #6: Intergenerational grouping gives older adults a chance to pass on their wisdom to the next generation. It is in living life that we learn life. And those who have lived it the longest are often full of wise counsel. The question is, “What is the most natural and effective setting to receive wise counsel from those who have lived more life than we have?” There is no better setting than in an intergenerational small group.
*A small group made up of multiple generations. In most instances an intergenerational group will include households of varying life stages with all persons in those households functioning together as a small group.
What do you think? Have a question? You can click here to jump into the conversation.
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Rick Howerton is truly one of the premier leaders in the small group movement. You can read the rest of his bio right here, check out his blog right here and follow him on Twitter right here.
I don’t disagree with this idea. I love the thought of inter-generational groups. But I have found that it takes a very special ‘older person’ to pull it off. In my ministry, the ‘retirement from ministry’ vibe is alive and well. “I raised my kids, now I need a break from kids/youth, etc”.
Any thoughts on how to break that pattern? And I say pattern because that mindset is exactly what was modeled for them by the older generation in their lives.
At what age do you bring the children in? There some obvious limitations with some ages.
Hi Ross. Great hearing from you, friend. It seems that most of the groups I’ve connected with are not hesitant to bring all ages into the room with the adults. Concerning the limitations… What would those be? Is it possible our paradigm of group life is such that we have created the limitations? For those of us who have grown up without kids in the room or Sunday School class they may seem like oddities when they might actually be great blessings. If you’re talking about preschoolers, I think the group will need to consider the personality of each one of them then decide how to handle those children.
Ethan… Oh how I understand your situation. Once while a small group pastor I met with some senior ladies asking them to simply take on relationships with younger women so they could learn from them. The immediate response… “I’ve raised my kids. This isn’t my responsibility.” No matter how often I pointed them to scripture they still would have nothing to do with it. A few suggestions… 1) start small. Try one group with one or two willing senior adults in the group. 2) Tell the stories that come from that group, how being in a multi-generational group was positive and transformational. 3) Make sure those in the group can tell their stories publicly during weekend worship. This could be a video tesimonial or a live spoken testimonial (If you do live spoken be sure it’s scripted, check the script even edit it if necessary, and make sure it’s read from the script. I can’t begin to tell you how often the moment was wasted because of lack of preparation and nothing significant being stated.). 4) Create heroes. Speak often of the senior adults who are in groups and the difference they are making in the lives of those in their group. Do it publicly and during senior adult events. Others will realize the importance and will most likely come on board. 5) Stop taking your senior adults to Branson! Here’s my point. We have led seniors to believe by our programming trips and lunches for them that their primary responsibility in church life is retirement. Reset the bar and raise it to a level that gives them ministry to accomplish, not just trips to take.
Rick
I came from a communal culture. Relating intergenerationally is a no-brainer. The American culture, and especially the church culture, is very segregated. Trying to encourage intergenerational groups will be making a paradigm shift and a culture change.
Coach Theresa
I came from a communal culture. Relating intergenerationally is a no-brainer. The American culture, and especially the church culture, is very segregated. Trying to encourage intergenerational groups will be making a paradigm shift and a culture change.
Coach Theresa
Thanks for jumping in here Theresa! To be sure, it will come naturally to some and will be a challenge to others. Offering a form of intergenerational will immediately appeal to some, while a group or a particular curriculum designed specifically for young couples will grab the attention of others. It will be interesting to see how things progress over the next decade.
mark
Thanks for jumping in here Theresa! To be sure, it will come naturally to some and will be a challenge to others. Offering a form of intergenerational will immediately appeal to some, while a group or a particular curriculum designed specifically for young couples will grab the attention of others. It will be interesting to see how things progress over the next decade.
mark
I have been leading an intergenerational family small group for the past few months. It has provided the opportunity for single mums and parents who struggle with child care the opportunity to get connected into the life of church and fellowship with others. We have children from 0 to 12 and adults from 20 to 40. I would love to get some grandparents along as well but so far no one has shown an interest. It would be great to hear how people organsie their groups to accomodate children and adults well. My wife and I took a bit of a “lets see what happens” approach and now that we are in a position of having to multiply the group into 2 or possibly 3 small groups (30 people don’t fit in my front room!) we need to be better prepared to support the new groups that are forming.
Thanks for jumping in here Liam! Wow! What a great report!
I’m with you…and would love to hear from some others about how they’re handling the larger size that can come with an intergenerational approach. One thing I can tell you is that a larger size presents an immediate opportunity for sub-grouping for portions of the meeting. 6 to 10 in three separate rooms offers a leadership development strategy that can go on in preparation for an eventual “birthing” scenario.
mark